I Realized That I’ll Never Be Happy If I Don’t Make This One Choice First

I’ve never considered myself to be a particularly discontent or ungrateful person. I’m pretty happy with my material possessions. I don’t especially want a bigger house or a nicer car. I drove an ‘05 van from 2017-2024, and I was perfectly happy with it. I often talked about how nice it was to have an old car because you never have to worry about it getting messed up. If someone dings it in a parking lot or a kid throws up all over it, who cares? It’s going to the salvage yard soon anyway.

I pride myself on being quite easy to please. I’m a simple girl. I don’t need 3-week luxury cruises to Tahiti or the latest smart home system. I’m happy with the basics.

But lately I’ve been realizing that being unsatisfied is a common theme in my life all the same. There’s a lot that I find myself unhappy about. There’s lots of things that I wish were different.

For example, certain relationships in my life aren’t as fulfilling or connected as I wish they were. My house is never quite clean enough. I wish my family lived closer to me. I’m jealous of people who have more talent than I do.

It makes me a little green to see people my age who have achieved far more than I have. (Why haven’t I built my billion dollar music empire or become mayor of NYC yet??)

And yet, isn’t that always going to be true? Nothing is ever perfect, and there’s constantly room for improvement. My relationships could always be better. There’s perpetually another level of success to strive for. 

But if I don’t choose to be satisfied with my circumstances now, I’ll never be content later, even if I have more. 

Paul talks about this very thing in Philippians 4:

“Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

Being content has nothing to do with what I have or don’t have. 

If I don’t cultivate a heart of contentment now, there will never be a time where I step back and say to myself, “Ah yes, my relationships have reached perfection. I’ve achieved everything I’ve ever wanted. Nothing further is required.” I’m forever going to want more and more. 

But if I allow the presence and strength of Christ to fill my longings and sustain my wants and desires, that’s where true happiness lies.

It’s when I can be okay with opening my phone and finding that someone I knew in college is now running their own 7-figure online company. Or when I can see someone else seemingly able to simultaneously be a wonderful mom and keep a beautiful home, and not be triggered by that.

It’s when I can say that even if everything that I have today disappeared in an instant, I could still rejoice in the Lord and be glad. 

It’s when my joy and satisfaction are fully dependent on God. When he’s all that I need. Not that it’s wrong to have desires. But to hand those over to him and be able to live joyfully, whether or not he ever chooses to give me what I hope for.

It’s when I can trust in his plan for my life and know that wherever life takes me, it’s what he has planned for me. 

Melinda Ashley
Digital Specialist, STAR 99.1 | Listen Now

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